The Reality of Attraction and Dating In a Post Modern Society

Many men today are confused as to how to attract				another way to counteract it and deal with it
and deal				(responding to
with women. Today our women are more beautiful				woman's general social power as the stimulus). The
(through				unnatural
natural selection and beautification), capable and				transgression of sexual energy had to find an
empowered				outlet.In order to become a successful seducer or
than at any point in history, and though this is a				'PUA' generally a
wonderful				man has to study a system of countless techniques
thing, it's had many ramifications when it comes to				and
relationships.Countless guys including 'great catches'				psychological triggers to try to bring a woman's level
are frustrated as				of
to how to deal with, attract and succeed with these				interest and attraction up to where it matters.He will
				have to face a lot of rejection through his training
desirable women. In fact many men are so				to start seeing results...results that work with
frustrated that we				women
now have 40 year old virgins. The major social				starting on the social level where she has the favor
dilemma that				and he
I see exists is this:Men are wondering "what is				will often try to break down her social identity and
wrong with the women (and why do				her
they treat us like this)"? and women are wondering,				belief in it so that her judgment becomes more
"Where				clouded and
are all the real men?"Guys want to be a nice guy				in his favor.If he can 'talk her into' it to a point
and they will even do what				where he comes close
society tells them to when it comes to dating and				to her expectational/ideal response, then he may
attracting				'get
women yet almost none of it works. In fact it				lucky'. This is the hard road and it's not natural,
usually repels				although
women away or incites them to reluctantly partake				with practice he can be more effective than being a
in the				nice guy
free gifts they're getting in exchange for their own				of confused/diminished character who follows the
time				outdated
even though the women are bored, not really				courtship dating (not mating) ritual.Overly 'wooful',
interested and				courting men (nice guys) or PUA's (pick-up
definitely not attracted.Societal 'dating' is a lot of				artists) are BOTH trying to work against the natural
presumptuous false				energy
expectations and ideals that cater to her social				of what women really want by trying to deal with
leanings				her on the
and not what her heart truly desires (also because				social level where she has received the power and
few of				they are
these men have 'character').Despite what the				now essentially below her (and almost always act
experts say, it often ends up being what				it).She likes the attention and social proof plus all the
neither of them want (to appease arcane social				gifts
norms) and				and meals at times from the nice guys but there's a
the guy goes home with an emptier wallet and a				part of
good night				her that is hollow and missing something (no pun
hug and she'll end up (having sex) with a jerk who				intended).She's not really attracted to these men and
she is				he doesn't
biologically attracted to.If he's 'lucky' he can maybe				understand why he keeps buying her all these gifts
this beautiful woman's friend.				and she
"Let's just be friends"...the kiss of death for him if he				doesn't call back and dumps him.There's no win/win
				situation there. I teach my men to keep
only wanted something else.So in order for men to				things interdependent and not to abuse their power
be more effective with dating they're				(potentially over women) when they attain
going to have to do some different things. And I'm				awareness but to
not				respect women and add value to their lives.If a
talking about becoming someone they're not so				woman can just find a man who is upfront, honest
they have to				and
'seduce' women or act like a jerk, be a playboy or				congruent with who he is and how he lives she'll
even to				respect him
'give her some of her own medicine'.Women are just				(probably be greatly relieved from social pressures)
wondering why that can't find a man they are				and
attracted to who actually IS healthy and stable.First				then can decide whether to join him on his
of all society promotes 'courtship' which is a				adventures or
socially derived function which worked great				not...and he doesn't get rejected.In the game of
throughout				attraction and who she is attracted to (who
modern history when people lived in the same				she chooses and not what she or society says), her
communities and				decisions
the focus was immediately on raising a family. Simply				are almost always made on the natural level
put,				(although
things changed.Today's independent women are				unhealthy gold-diggers base their decisions on the
more interested in exercising				social
their freedoms and seeing what happens instead of				level and teenage boy band fans will become
putting up				infatuated with
with all of the implied expectations dealing with				a star's independent character portrayal).The
having to				biological and natural mating instinct is the timeless
marry each guy they go out with.Take a look at the				authority that guarantees something like social
hit 'Sex and the City'. Quite a long ways				development
from 'Leave it to Beaver' (and modern programming				wouldn't throw nature off it's course (although it's
would have				now
been blasphemy back then; that's how far we've				being threatened).Everyone knows how to
come).So I don't know why dating experts keep				reproduce; we don't have to be taught
teaching dating as				(Return to Blue Lagoon). Social influence has just
courtship; it's just so antiquated. Is it really to				gotten in
'protect' women (who are more independent and				the way. It has confused some men so much that
powerful than				they wonder
ever before anyways)?Maybe they just don't want				if they were ever meant to reproduce or go
to face the reality of what women				through the
want.Yes, most women eventually want to get				mating ritual. This is a very true reality for many
married but they want				men.And yet woman will often end up with jerks and
it to happen casually and naturally when they meet				losers
a guy now				instead who are fearless and strong in natural
to see how it develops (with someone she's				character
interested in)				because they're the closest options available to her
INSTEAD OF having guys wooing and courting her				attraction response ideal (of how she 'feels' when
from date				she's
number one with flowers, dinner, walking on				with him). Basically our biology is stronger than our
eggshells and lots				social
of incoming phone calls from someone she's not				programming.And nice guys everywhere will just not
interested in				get what's going on
(unless she's letting her parents or social				and they will remain confused and disparately
expectations rule				powerless or
the decision).Usually that's a LOT of pressure and				less than they could be most of their adult lives
expectation to deal				unless
with plus the guy's are coming on too heavy and it's				they really find their own path through the mire.The
SO				answer lies in discovering what society has hidden
predictable...they all seem the same to her just about				from
and				him. It's not in being the wife-beater t-shirt guy, it's
it's very tiring. Now it's the good guys who are				about being a man of character; a man who is
getting				comfortable in
their hearts trampled (see pop music) by these				his own skin and can handle (and please) women
women.In a traditional 'dating' situation (which we				without
know				having to say a word.This is what women want. A
mainstream society promotes) she's not necessarily				real man. One who is respectful
being				but never panders to women or let's them violate
herself (although her grandma may have been),				his own
she's being				(respectful) boundaries. The fact that women have
what society tells her to be (although times have				become
changed)				more demanding today just makes real relationships
and how to act.Plus the man isn't getting anywhere				harder
either because he's				but I'm teaching attraction and not 'dating' or
putting a fake foot forward to essentially buy her				marriage.I don't know when the dating experts will
attention.He's not being his true self upfront and				EVER catch up but
those things will				they are right about one thing (which is skewed by
surface later on both ends anyways. With the				the
progression of				seduction experts); women WANT men to be
independence and advancement in both men and				themselves.The way seduction experts see it is if
women, there's				you just 'be
more 'demons' that are being hidden as well as				yourself' you will fail with women so you have to
incompatible				basically
personality traits.Not to mention that everyone				turn yourself into someone you're not just in order
looking for a 'date' is only				to get
looking for an interpersonal solution for				the end result (usually sex).The way I see it is that
themselves...they				men are NOT really being themselves
don't really know the other person, just what they				in the first place. This is where the problem lies;
are				society
judging.So, if a man follows society's advice of				has diminished a man's own sense of masculinity,
(courtship)				independence and his place in the world in relation to
'dating' women, it's like living an incongruency (or lie)
with what he REALLY wants and what she wants				everything else..it's all watered down so that he has
unless they				become
really ARE looking and about ready to get				a man of lower character and almost unable to instill
married.Most single, young (and now older) men want				the
to have physical				attraction response in women.It seems the only men
relationships and aren't looking to get married right				that women are 'attracted to' (we're
away				not talking about what society says she wants
until they really get to know a woman and courting				about marrying
her isn't				a 'nice guy', etc.) are the bad boys and jerks who
really getting to know her.If there was a price on				used to
love then a lot of people would be				be social outcasts.Why is this so? Simply because
permanently out of luck. Women know that love				the other men aren't stepping
doesn't cost a				up to the plate anymore. Our grandfathers were
thing and I believe it (ie. J.Lo's natural and not social				men of high
side) yet people will continue to try and buy her				natural character.And the men like this that are
affection.Today, desirable and empowered women				balanced and high in
want to express their				character, they're taken right away by women or in
(newfound) sexual freedom without having to have				the
this guy				greatest demand. This balanced man is rare to find
dragging her down. Basically girls really DO just want				today; a
to				man who can be himself, has qualities that women
have fun but there's so much PRESSURE.Now a man				want and
can do this without having to seduce her or be the				isn't afraid or intimidated of being around beautiful
nice guy of courting her and getting both of them				women.In more scientific terms, men today have
nowhere.				become the response
Most importantly he doesn't have to become				to women as the stimulus (in empowered, forced
someone he's not				reality
or being an abusive jerk just to succeed.If men and				cultures because the whole world is NOT like this).
women could just be upfront, casual and honest				The
with each other in their intentions they could both				natural reality of attraction (and the MATING not
have a				dating
lot of fun and get to know each other without false				sequence) is that men are the stimulus to which
				women will
expectations.And another important point, sex isn't				respond to.A woman will do things to look good so
likely to happen with				that men will 'pick
traditional courtship dating because society tells her				her' but their relationship or not rests on HER
to				response to
delay sex so she can hold onto a keeper (which				HIM and not how he thinks she looks. She has to
makes sense				sift through
for COURTSHIP). The focus is more on their				the men of different character to decide.The men
social/fake/expected relationship and less on who				who have the most success with women anywhere
they				have a
really are as people.When guys take the 'dating				high level of 'character' in any of the three areas I
route, it's like they have a				define
hidden agenda to get somewhere with her taking				in my free ebook; his natural, independent and social
this route				character.Good news for men is that women KNOW
and she knows it and in the wrong metaframe of				to respond to men of
courtship				high natural character and pick them out of the
with him pursuing, it makes her want him less.It				crowd.
looks like he's hiding his true self and paying for her				Unfortunately for many women, that means they'll
attention. She often feels obligated to give him at				keep
least a				irrationally choosing to sleep with bad boys who
hug in exchange for everything he bought her and				aren't
yet she'll				emotionally healthy until more guys like us come
run off with a more dangerous man she is attracted				along.In fact high social status men wonder if a
to				women are just
because of the way SHE feels when she's around				using them for their money/power or not (ie. what
him.She doesn't get these feelings of intoxication				Jay-Z raps
from the				about).Women know when a man is who his body
wooing, low independent character men who are				says he is; it's hard
responding to				to 'trick' her intuition about whether he can give her
their perception of her. She wants to be respected				the
and				indescribable psychosexual response that only a man
treated as an equal (and nice guys put her above				of high
themselves)				natural character can give her (few men reach this
so she often ends up pursuing an independent				level but
man.Women have changed dramatically in a social and				about all could).She is extrapolating and judging men
personal				just as harshly as men
matter so that they now have tremendous power,				judge women. This is a whole area I get into in my
capability				free
and favor in life. They're marrying later and less				downloadable ebook on the website.These
interested in men wooing them when it comes to				physiologically and emotionally based decisions she
attraction				makes about men will overrule her strong social
and dating (unless they want to take material				influences;
advantage of				her body and physiological desire can't resist.And if a
the resources men are throwing at them).A woman				good man can just develop himself and his own
will often wonder if she will ever find a real man				character, he can have great consistent success
who she can just have a fun and REAL time with				with women
which may or				(while respecting them) and when he does want to
may not naturally end up in sex. She doesn't want				settle down
men				he can find a good woman from many options.For
following her around like a whipped puppy, having				women, there could be more options of 'real men'
them by				and
the string and not respecting her own				they will stop choosing the bad boy or jerks when
independence.Gold-diggers might like this to maintain				they
high social status				finally have the option of stable guys who have
but healthy women don't feel attraction for these				healthier
men. It's				character (with just as much natural connection and
unnatural.The power has shifted and it's changed				ability
almost everything.				to please her as the bad boys).Women will be
Tradition is thrown off course and nature itself is				grateful because there would be more real men
being				so they don't have to fight over them as much or
slapped in the face by social culture and it's influence				be as
				lonely. Men just have to become men of higher
(just turn on the t.v. and you'll be inundated with it				character and
non-stop).Men are wondering what went wrong and				improve themselves in the 3 areas that matter to
if they themselves are				women. This
the problem when it comes to dating. Their entire				CAN be done with the right resources to bring a
psyche and				man into his
outlook on reality has been affected and this				natural destiny.When a man can be more of himself
affects all				at all times and he can
areas of their life.All of this is NOT desirable to alot				communicate with women that he is a man
of these women who have				(nonverbally and
really improved themselves in all of the aspects of				verbally) who is not ashamed of who he is; she can
their				respect
life...a woman doesn't want to settle for LESS, she				this and will know where he stands on her
wants				interest/attraction level (hint; he has a good
men that are worthy of her time and not afraid of				chance).And the further he communicates that he
her for				really IS the man
just being herself (who she has become).Little does				she idealized, the easier everything will be to take
she know though that she would be a completely				things
different woman if she were raised in another				to a connected interdependent experience.She's the
culture.				one who will make the choice and decision of
Little do men realize that they would have natural				whether anything's going to happen so it's up to a
success				man to
with women without really trying if they went to				help her out there. Most guys fail before they start
many other				by not
cultures in the world.They would be SHOCKED to				being what women want and not following the
find that 'it just happens'. This				natural order of
is what nature or intelligent design intended. This				things.For a naturally successful man who has lots of
realization on my part is what I call 'cultural				options of
differentiation'.The socio-cultural 'forced reality' which				women he can take his pick but it's still the woman
began in America				who are
around the 1960's has influenced the relationship				(eagerly) choosing to be with him.She can't tell a
dynamics				man to be 'more of a man', he just has to
of countless millions of people now around much of				be that man and then can have all the success he
the				dreams of
world. It's the impetus of a 50% divorce				with much less dependency on the words to say
rate.Thankfully there is still the natural reality of				because he
attraction;				will be operating from where HIS power lies, his
the ability within man and woman to know what to				natural
do when it				character and ability to make women swoon despite
comes to attraction. It's within all of us and more				his other
important than the social pervasive reality that				personal faults.This is about something more
defines				important than a quick-fix,
almost all current relations in these societies.For man				this is about bringing balance back to the force of
to truly begin to succeed with women and attraction,				male and
				female relationships.So my advice is for men to
he must cut through all of the junk, see the matrix				become their true selves of high
for				character potential and strength in all three areas
himself and understand his relation to it.The fact that				(natural, independent/personality and social) which will
women respond to men of high natural character
still doesn't change; it never will or we would be				henceforth fix almost ALL of their other problems
threatened				with
with the thought of extinction (note the birth rate is				attracting and succeeding with women they once
				were
increasing rapidly in traditional or natural cultures the				infatuated.It's all about the man and developing his
most).Independent career women have less time to				character so that
raise more kids				women will respond (to his characteristics as the
in their natural/traditional role as mother and nurturer				stimulus)
				the way she dreams of responding when she finds
(reference; the neighbors in 'Cheaper by the				this kind of
Dozen').Choosing a path of seduction or 'pick up arts'				man.That is the underlying current in this crazy,
in order to				mixed up world
get the end result is now not the only option. There				that is still the source of pure hope and life
is				throughout
another and more powerfully effective way.You				most cultures. It's up to a man to embrace and
see, current social byproduct (response solutions) like				represent the
				characteristics of his nature and self that will drive
pick up and seduction have become very popular				women
because the				wild.Rion Williams is the celebrated author of 'Mens
way women are responding to these men.Women				Guide
not being interested, ignoring them, and rejecting				to Women' and is the first person to quantify and
them is very real (and common) so some men have				put
found				in writing 'what women want'.

Bournes Baskets

The Reality of Attraction and Dating In a Post Modern Society